It is just disappointing, though — here I am, lots of women, at college, my last year of college, and heading out to Montana next year where there are even fewer women, and [I have] no woman, not even any leads.
[Roommate] Dave and I were sitting on the balcony last night, watched First Floor Sarah in a nice dress come out and get into some guy’s small convertible. Dave saw them come back and he said it looked like a 1st Date — no kiss, she got out after a little while and went inside, he turned up the radio and roared off (feeling manly and happy, I suppose — I would be if I were him). Wow, I said when Dave told me, a 1st Date. Must be nice. Hell, even a second or 3rd Date would be nicer. I haven’t been on a first date in over a year. F***, that’s depressing. Women all around and nary a drop to drink.
[From journal of 30 June 1995, Journal 10, which journal entry starts with “8:30 p.m., Garcia’s [Pizza] on Wright [Street, Champaign], 2nd floor, behind the tomato [outdoor sign]”]