Tag Archives: cat

Our Household Pet of the Week!

After hearing a local radio station advertise its pet of the week, I realized we should have one for our household. So I’d like to announce that our Pet of the Week is Sammy Dog:2014_01_02_mh (120)_cropAnd I’d also like to add that this honor is retroactively conveyed upon him for the previous 108 weeks. Judges cited his loyalty, affection, and his pooping-outdoors as what put him over the top.

Our Also Ran for Pet of the Week is Justice Cat. His “Also-Ran” status is also conveyed upon him for the previous 108 weeks he has lived in our home.

2014_01_01_mh (8)_cropI’d like to advise the cat that he’d be a more serious competitor for Pet of the Week if he’d improve his relationship with the judges by not trying to sleep on their faces and by not pawing at seemingly every available vertical surface in the house between the hours of 9 p.m. and 7 a.m. Also, if he’d stop biting our ankles when he wants attention, or revenge, or for whatever reason he bites our ankles.

Shakespearean stage directions in my hallway tonight

Emergeth the cat:

2013_12_23_mh (138)_emergeth

A song that’s right twice a day

“It’s six-fifty-0ne for the kitty cat;

it’s 6:51 for the puppy dog;

it’s 6:51 for everyone in the Central Time zone.”

(The above lyrics have a tune. I’m not sure how to quickly convey it here, but basically, imagine the tune of a jingle in a commercial for a heating-cooling contractor produced for local TV in the 180th-largest local TV market. Not quite this, but close.)

Poem: A cat IS a cloud

Some smoke from a cake —

more steam than icing —

clouds a cat.

Some grass became pie

under dark candy-bugs.

A breeze tree, a growl in the belly,

is a smile on porcelain, or

a window with a heart.

Caramel and coffee with fish

make dirt, an eye, and a cup.

Candy glass:

my brother in sky;

a cat IS a cloud

[Written 2013 Nov. 4 using magpo.com. As I was playing around, a process idea came along: use no verbs, pick only concrete nouns – though some got used as adjectives and as figurative language]

Stephen Justice Benitez


stevie_j_2013_09_07_mh (106)our cat, Stephen Justice Benitez.

His name used to be just “Justice,” and at home, he goes by “Kitty” or, when he’s on our dining room table, “CAT!” But having now taken on this more important-sounding moniker, he is also constructing a more important career than simply being a moth-hunter. He recently revealed that he may have been an “alleycat extra” in the movie “Flicka” and he expects to soon be named U.S. Ambassador to Chile.

(Note: My wife said there’s something about living with the daily weirdness that is a cat’s behavior, and how that weirdness has started to seep into how we talk about him.)

Stephen Justice plans to murder an avian something:stephenjustice (1)Practicing self-decapitation:stephenjustice (2) The slope of the cat’s sleep is y = -x.stephenjusticeBall of cat.stephenjustice (3)Tomato-camo:2013_07_26_mh (5)_stevejusticebenitez